Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Beer boys for tomorrow

The men in charge of supplying us with sustenance after the game are...

Sean Patterson

Viva JP

The wing slash fullback Viva JP is the next to give us a few details

First Names: Jean Paul Viva

Last Name: van Huffel

Birth Date: 09/04/1987

Birth Place: Sandton JHB

Country of Birth: South Africa

Height in cm: 180cm

Weight in kilos: 82kg

Preferred position: Wing

Primary School: Usutu Forest Primary School

High School: St Charles College

Tertiary Education: University of Cape Town

Favourite Movie: Law Abiding Citizen

Favourite Music: Dubstep

Favourite Food: Pizza

Favourite Player: Richard Kahui

what do you do before a rugby game: warm up

Favourite playing moment: Scoring a try against the Nadoe's

Godspeed Mighty Cobras

First and fore mostly a bloody big congratulations, and high fives all round for making it to the second last stage of the UCT internal league. A feat achieved 5 years in a row since the inception of the PC’s in 2006, and our pristine track record is still in tact! An impressive achievement. I’m proud as a peacock, as should be you.

But now is not the time to gloat. Tomorrow we have our biggest test of the season thus far. Umbumbo are typically a quality and very fiery side, they give it their all and hate to lose. We’ve  come up against them many times throughout the last 5 years, and both teams have a great amount of mutual respect (its not a rare occurrence to catch a cobra enjoying a gentle brew with an umbumbo at Tiger (Fez these days??) at 3.57am on a Saturday), however our track record speaks for itself. A track record that boldly tells tales of how we have come out the victor more often than not (ask Waz B for the exact figure). We are always hungrier. We are always harder. We are always better. We always fucking HATE losing more.

So Cobras go out there tomorrow and do what you do best. Give it your all. Go hard. No regrets.

I don’t want anyone sulking off to that changing room, head down, drinking a beer to drown the sorrow of loss, thinking if only I had given that much more. If only I had made that tackle, committed to that ruck, passed the ball, etc. No regrets.

No. I want you going into that changing room hearts full, knowing that win or lose
(Fucking win) you fucking gave it your all, that tonight you put your body on the line. And when that first ice cold gloriously golden lager starts gushing down your gullet, you are content in fact that you gave your absolute everything for your brother standing next to you in purple.

I leave you with this. Scarface knows the vibe….

Sending the best of luck from Croke Park in Dublin,


Thursday, August 26, 2010

UCTRFC.co.za Quater Final review,,,

The Championship section had the more competitive matches with Ubumbo beating the Spanners. The Spanners only have themselves to blame for loosing the match. Spanners having the numbers to the right decided to use there pack instead which did not pay off at all. There kicker on the evening also didn’t help them at all missing 3 vital penalties. Cobras had their grudge match against an ever improving ikhaya team. Ikhaya the team that kicked the Cobras out in the Semi’s last year didn’t look like the team of old. Cobras played their patient but flamboyant brand of rugby that we are use to seeing. Cobras were just to good for them winning the match 33 – 06 with Callan Artus, JP van Huffel, Kyle Rennie, D. Johnson and Stuart Black scoring for the Cobras.

Nadoes had an early scare from the Wild Boys as they were held 7 - 7 at half time, then soon showed why they are defending Internal league champions as they put their foot on the gas and rushed to a 21 – 7 lead which was also the final score. Try scorers for the Nadoes are Shafiek Nordien, Theo Von Aspern and Brad VD Westhuizen. The final match between MOB and Smuts was a tight affair as Mob could only manage to win 5 – 3 as Smuts brought the A game on the evening.

The results as they happened:

Championship Section

Steinhoff Spanners 08 – 14 Steinhoff Ubumbo
Steinhoff Cobras 33 – 06 Steinhoff Ikhaya
Steinhoff Nadoes 21 – 07 Steinhoff Wild Boys
Steinhoff MOB 05 – 03 Steinhoff Smuts

The Cobras go marching on...

The Cobras progressed to the Semi-Finals of the UCT Internal League last night with an impressive 33-6 win over a well drilled Ikhaya side. It was one of the performances of the year as The Cobras rose to the big occasion with a massive performance. In reaching the Semi-Finals The Cobras keep their record of advancing to the Semi-Final for the fifth year in a row.

The Cobras face Ubumbo in a massive Semi-Final next Wednesday...

Full match report to follow...

Oh so brave

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Everywhere you go...

Goooooooood morning gentle friends. It’s roughly 10am and I’m still wiping the sleep out of my eyes. I’m tired. I’m tired because I couldn’t sleep last night and I couldn’t sleep last night, not because I was tired, but because I was jittery with expectation. It’s Wednesday baby and I’m titillated at the thought of watching the Cobras quarter final match. My nipples are erect and goose bumps cover my inner thighs. There’s no place in the world I’d rather be than in Cape Town and with the Cobras. Many are hyping this game up as a re-match of last year’s appalling semi- final which saw the demise of the Cobras and the crowning of the Nadoes once again. We were sad men. Distraught you might say. But like the late, great Rodney Bernhardt said: “the world doesn’t need another sad man, it needs a fucking hero.”

I believe he wasn’t just talking about life as a security officer, he was speaking in broader terms. He was talking to us. He was sending us a message. Today we kill the duck and put the steaming locomotive that is the Purple Cobras Rugby Team back on the tracks to victory. Let’s end this duck boys. Let’s end it like Lusky might end a blind, wing clipped guinea fowl... with four twelve gauge shot guns at close range. The time has come. We need to put behind us the emotional fair wells to the likes of Luke Du Plessis and focus not on their absence but on doing their names proud. It’s the business end of the season and we’ve got plenty of wheeler dealers to get the job done. 

With that said I’ like to produce the weather forecast for today. I’m not particularly proud of the fact that this is done by simply looking out the window. But as you know the Green Mile has its’ very own micro climate so here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to give you the weather as it stands right now and tell you what to prepare for for this evening. A lot can change you see. 

Weather for Cape Town, South Africa 

15°C | °F

Current: Clear

Wind: N at 3 km/h

Humidity: 59%


21°C | 12°C

There you have it. Just as I expected. Clear sunny skies for the day with a very light Northerly wind. A high of 15 with a low of 12 tells me that it’s still winter but I bet we were all fairly relieved to wake up to sunshine this morning. That reminds me of a great song.

‘Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone. Ain’t smiles when she’s away. Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone and she’s always gone for far too long...’

You guys know that tune? It’s a ‘killing me softly’ type of vibe by the Fugees. Speaking of the Fugees did anyone else happen to notice that Wyclef Jean is running for president in Haiti? I’ serious. The brother has been parading through streets on the top of armoured vehicles waving to his potential people. He is Haitian but grew up in America where he became a famous singer. It was recently written that he has funded many concerts through his charity which is a little messed up. When asked about the prospect of losing the election: "Even if I lose, I do win," he says. "The world will have known that in history there was a young man from Haiti who felt he wanted to do more than music, to engage in Haitian politics and help move the country forward. So in that sense I feel that even if I am to lose, I am to win." Talking about himself in the third person there. Dubious you might say. Anyway. 

So back to the weather. A northerly wind is not too disastrous unless it switches. And switch it will. By 8pm tonight I’m predicting a strong SW wind blowing on the Green Mile. That’s not exactly the devil wind but it will certainly push temperatures down and make goal kickers pick up a few more blades of grass to judge the wind. Personally I feel that Warren Butler shouldn’t have too much trouble with his conversions tonight. It’s always much easier when tries are being run in under the poles. Nuff said. 

I would like to round off today’s weather report with an interview I did with one of our Cobras players many months ago. It never went to print due to some software glitches I was experiencing at the time. I would also like to add that in the future all interviews done by myself will be done via the brain mining techniques used in the movie ‘Inception’. I’m going to come clean with you guys because you’re all straight shooters and I consider you my friends. I invented that technology. that movie was, in fact, based on my exploits. I know, it’s all a bit much to take in at this point. Don’t bother asking the producers about me. They’ll deny it you see. I costs someone a lot less when they don’t have to pay property rights to the master mind behind. It’s going to take many years of therapy and many more years of binge drinking to get over this little bump. I am here to ask you to hold my hand through this rocky patch. So what I was trying to say was instead of the usual pre-match interview I’ll be doing a little exploring into the minds and imaginations of your fellow Cobra’s and then describing in detail what I find there. I takes a huge amount of courage to delve into the mind of Ian Armstrong. It takes even more courage to go there when Swali is in town. Can you imagine. Assume we’re walking through Army’s dream land.... Clouds, beers, soccer balls, big boobed bikinied babes, soft pillows, warm duvets, other people’s clothes... Heaven (to some). Then all of a sudden grey clouds move across the sky and the calming music turns to somehting from ACDC (back in black or Highway to Hell). The soft pillows burst into flame, the clothes decay in front of your eyes, the soccer balls pop, the beers go warm and flat and little horned goat men with sharp teeth run amok raping the brilliantly breasted beauties. Can you imagine that shit? I won’t be doing an interview with him anytime soon. Swali sitting on a throne breathing fire with little horns poking through his hair. Fuck me that’s a terrifying thought. Anyway. That’s the deal for the next few interviews. Right now we’ll get stuck into a brief discussion with none other Nic ‘Fridge’ Bailey. 

Bug: Nic, you joined the Cobras at the beginning of the year. 

Nic: Correct

Bug: Sorry I wasn’t quite finished there. I was building towards a question. Not the lack of inflection.

Nic: Sorry. Inflection is very interesting isn’t it?

Bug: Huh?

Nic: What?

Bug: Do you watch Community? 

Nic: No?

B: Enough now. So what did you envision when you joined this wonderful family?

N: Well I always knew you guys threw a bit of a vibe from when I played for the Socos many years ago. I hadn’t been enjoying my rugby and I needed a fresh start with an aspiring team. It’s worked out really well.

B: As it has for us Nic. Thank you for your participation. It’s been a great contribution. Tell me... what does Nic Bailey get up to on his weekends when he isn’t playing rugby?

N: Well I’ll probably be watching it. Other than that I’m always making a mission to find some waves around the Cape peninsula. It keeps me going. I recently went on a trip to Indo and that was just mind altering. It was tough to come back and start work again. 

B: I know what you mean. Actually I don’t. The real working stage of my life hasn’t quite begun but when it does I’ll be knocking on your door (figuratively speaking of course) for some advice on how to manage the pain. Is that ok?

N: I suppose so. 

B: Thanks for your kindness.

B: Do you realise that the letter N (indicating your responses in this interview) and the letter B (indicating my responses) are your initials. Quite a mind fuck. B stands for Bug obviously but were the reader not so intimately familiar with the Cobras and me then they might think you were talking to yourself. Are you talking to yourself Nic?

N: What is going on here?

B: Have you seen Shutter Island?

N: Yes

B: Same sort of vibe.

N: Oh I see.

B: But do you really see....

That’s that and a bag of Fritos. Thank you for your time. Next time we go balls deep into the imagination of Warren Butler. Interesting times ahead. 

Always take the weather with you!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Quater-Final time..

It's that time of year again when the UCT Internal League reaches the knock-out stages. This The Cobras face Ikhaya in the Quaters, which is a repeat of last years Semi. The Cobras will be looking to secure their place in the Championship Semi's with a big performance tomorrow night. It's going to be a great clash between the two sides as they fight for that Semi spot tomorrow night...

This is where the competition really starts, it's time to turn it on...

The Cobras vs. Ikhaya
Meet 18:30 SHARP below Cecil
Kick off 19:30
Let's set the record straight...
Oh so brave

He goes by the name of Jussy B...

Cobras 2010

First Names: Justin Nicolas
Last Name: Bijl
Birth Date: 10/05/87
Birth Place: Cape Town
Country of Birth: South Africa
Height in cm: 183cm
Weight in kilos: 90kg
Preferred position: Centre
Primary School: Western Province Preparatory School (Wetpups)
High School: Diocesan College (Bishops)
Tertiary Education: University of Cape Town (UCT)
Favourite Movie: The Hangover
Favourite Music: Electronic
Favourite Food: Steak, egg and chips
Favourite Player: Heinrich Brussow
What do you do before a rugby game: Eat two chocolates and drink an energade
Favourite playing moment: Beating Maties in u20 to cap off an unbeaten season

Beer boys

To bring beer tomorrow:









Monday, August 23, 2010

UCTRFC.co.za Quater Final preview


The quarter finals are here and teams know that no mistakes can be afforded if they tend to qualify for a spot in the semi finals. Teams are expected to field there strongest teams for the next two weeks as they make a surge for a spot in the finals.

Wednesday night will see the entire Steinhoff Internal league battle it out on the Green mile as they try and cement a place for the next round, with the knock out phase now in place teams seriously can’t afford to slip up.

In the Champions section Nadoes and Cobras the two most experienced teams will be keeping and eye on each other’s progress as there is unfinished business between the two, and there is a possibility that the two could meet in the Finals. Cobras play Ikhaya and Nadoes play the Wild Boys. MOB and Spanners the teams that have really come to the forefront could just be the surprise packages for this year as they to have showed why they are in the quarters with and impressive vain of form.

The Cup winners sections have the remainder of teams on the war parth for the league Cup. Panthers, Catsville and Turtles narrowly being beaten for a spot in Section A. So they do seem the favourites to win this section.

Both sections will have some awesome matches as teams step up their game.

Full fixture round up:
Championship Section

Steinhoff Spanners Vs Steinhoff Ubumbo B - Field 20:30
Steinhoff Cobras Vs Steinhoff Ikhaya C - Field 19:30
Steinhoff Nadoes Vs Steinhoff Wild Boys B - Field 19:30
Steinhoff MOB Vs Steinhoff Smuts C - Field 20:30

Cup Winners Section

Steinhoff Turtles Vs Steinhoff Clarendon B - Field 17:30
Steinhoff Kopano Vs Steinhoff Marquard C - Field 17:30
Steinhoff Panthers Vs Steinhoff College House B - Field 18:30
Steinhoff Catsville Vs Steinhoff Shebeen Boys C - Field 18:30


Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Last pool game...

The Cobras take on Res side Kopano in tonights clash on The Green Mile. It has been a two week break which has seen the Cobras fine tuning their touch skills getting ready for the knock-out rounds of the competition.

The two teams have met 3 times in their history:

2006: Cobras 10 - 7 Kopano
2009: Cobras 33 - 0 Kopano
2009 Quaterfinal: 40 - 15 Kopano

It looks set to be a great fixture, with the rain coming down it won't stop The Cobras brand of running rugby.

The Cobras vs. Kopano
Meet 18:30
Kick off: 19:30
UCT B-Field

Oh so brave

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Monday, August 09, 2010

Internal league player profile

Written by Clement le Roux
Thursday, 05 August 2010 13:07

First Names: Kyle
Last Name: Rennie
Birth Date: 30/06/1987
Birth Place: Adelaide, Eastern Cape
Country of Birth: South Africa
2010 Internal League Team: Purple Cobras

Height in cm: 1,83m
Weight in kilos: 92kgs
Preferred position: Loose Forward
Primary School: Kokstad Junior School
High School: St Andrew's College
Tertiary Education: UCT
Favourite Movie: Not really a movie but Band of Brothers the series
Favourite Music: Anything old school
Favourite Food: Biltong
Favourite Player: Marty Holah
what do you do before a rugby game: Nothing specific, just focus on whats expected of me for the game
Favourite playing moment: Cobras winning the Internal League

For more info visit: http://www.uctrfc.co.za/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=11929:player-profile-kyle-rennie&catid=41:internal-league&Itemid=74

Thursday, August 05, 2010

Stefan Terblanche WOO! Cobras interview time...

A man of many talents!

After many failed ‘I’ll call you back’s’, Stefan Terblanche, the new coffee and calculator configuration man at Allan Gray, managed to slot me in at the tail end of his coffee and bagel run, and this is what the Boland, Griquas, Sharks, Springbok and lastly Cobras Stalwart had to say.

1.Some say that you are the old man, the stalwart if you like, of the Cobras setup. Do you think that is because of your resounding resemblance to the great Stefan Terblanche?

I think that there are a few of us in our fifth year of Cobras Rugby now and it really is true that you can't buy experience. I like to think i bring a bit of stabillity to the back like Stefan but truth be told I cannot really see much of a resemblance.

2. Do you even look up to the man? I mean we all do, but you must especially.

I used to think he was a pretty solid fullback with a great up and under but I think it's time for the old man to hang up his boots before people really start taking the piss out of him (and me).

3. As a Cobra co founder what do you think about the vibe in this year’s camp?

I must say there is nothing that gets me more revved up than a game of Rugby on the Green Mile. We have always had a good vibe in the past but I must say that I think this is one of the better vibes we have had. There is a belief amongst the boys that we will win this trophy and that belief and passion is what will take us to the top. From the so called "stalwarts" to the guys in their first year everyone has brought an incredible vibe and I just can't wait to lift that trophy in a couple of months time.

4. What do Wednesday nights on the Green Mile mean to you?

Wednesday nights are what gets me through a kak week at work. It is basically the beginning of the weekend for me.

5. A Sunday with the books in hand and a calculator just to double check, or a Cobras touch session?

I can't even think of something witty to say here...Touch of course.

6. Stellies jol or a Cape Town jol?

I enjoy the odd Stellies jol but I'm a Cape Town person myself and would pick a messy Tiger session over a Filthy Terrace night. Though, as i said, I do also enjoy the odd bit of a Stellies vibe.

7. Any scandal you can reveal to use that you have heard/ learnt during your time thus far at AG?

Not much hey though I do know how much Bishops and all your parents have in reserves.

8. How do you carbo load on a Tuesday before internal league Wednesdays?

Ideally a quiet beer with the boys at Forries is always a good way to get into the vibe otherwise a nice bowl of Spag Bol in front of the fire watching Boots n All with Naas.

9. I hear you’re a big fan of the Sharks. ‘Black and white, nothing else matters’, apparently . Your kinda vibe?

There is nothing that boils my blood more than a guy who lives in Cape Town and supports the Shark. I mean really if you have lived here for more than two years surely you have come to your senses by now...PROOOOOVINCE for life.

10. How do you take your coffee? Black with one sugar, with milk, or do you just crunch on the beans like a real financial advisor?

Don't drink coffee hey it upsets my sleeping patterns.

11. What’s your most cherished gadget?

I would have to say my Nokia cell phone. It's basically a torch with a cellphone attached. They say it's bigger than the Blackberry.

12. What do you do for a bit of ‘me time’?

I like to get out into the mountain - anything from mountain biking and running to Rock climbing.

13. Castle or Black Label, or perhaps a single malt now that you a working man?

I enjoy a whiskey on the rocks whilst playing a game of Poker but nothing beats a draught of Black Label at Forries.

14. Some say that Allan Gray was your grandfather, any truth behind the rumours?

Not that I know of...hopefully he leaves something in his will for me though.

15. Who’s your rugby idol?

My idol would have to be Chris Latham - I think we have the leg drive in common.

16. Any wise, AG inspired, words of wisdom for your fellow Cobras?

This is our fifth year of this unbelievable vibe, let's get out on that field on Wednesday night and show them the type of rugby we play. Let's run them off their feet and play the rugby we enjoy...If we do that we will not lose.