Chinamen... Wowee it has been s very long, hasn't it? It's been so long in fact that I had forgotten my password for this very blogsite. I was unhappy to see that the protection policy for such a situation is simply to forward your password to your e- mail. Not great if your e- mail pasword is the same for everything else Not great at all. Nonetheless here we are agan for yet another instalment of Bug's weather report. Unfortunately our sponsors have pulled out on me so this is pretty much a solo effort on my behalf with zero reward, other than those sweet smiles on your faces.
Today's show is very special for a number of reasons. Firstly, and most importantly, tomorrow's game is against the Nadoes, bru, and thus I feel it my duty to provide you with something that i both inspiring, humorous and educating at the same time. A difficult job for most people, but then again I am rather awesome. Secondly, today's interview is with a newer memeber of the Cobra's family. A stalwart this season who's put in some big hits and powerful leg drives, which is expected considering the body enhancing supplements he's rather partial to. I speak of nne other than Brendan "Evan Stone" Raubenheimer. I'll give you a quick squiz at a little convo we had over a spring role and guac sub the other day. Both were equally delicious I'll have you know, but with a chicken/ guac sub priced at R19. 50 and a 'largechickennoodlepleaze' at R17, there really is no doubt whichoption one should take. A 'chickenspling' role is roughly R6. I had both, Raubs had the sub. Poor decision I reckon. Anyway. Finally, it is the last time that I write this very prestigious publication as a simple bystander Tomorrow I don the Purple and White to stand amongst my brothers on the luscious Green Mile. Thinking about just gets me hard. Also I met two incredibly hot Swiss twins last night so I'm lank stoked about life. Twins Basil, TWINS!
This week the weather report reads as follows:
Min: 11°C
Max: 21°C
Weather: Fine, cloudy by evening
Wind: moderate southerly
Sunrise: 07:34
Sunset: 18:09
Moonrise: 10:09
Moonset: 23:36
Moonphase: Waxing
There you have it. It will as always be flippin' cold up at Varsity so I suggest everyone come warmlydressed to make sure the wolf is kept from the door so to speak. Wind will most likely be rather brisk with a bit of cloud cover in the evening. Nothing to drastic, so don't fret.
Now the time you've all been waiting for... Some say he's half man half pornstar, others say he's an emotional black hole, women say he's a man whore, but we just know him as Disco Straubs.
Bug: Raubi my boy how very kind of you to join me. How's life?
Raubs: Ah Bg it's a pleasure. Basically I'm just trying to get my shit together, you know varsity and all that.
B: I know, we all go through that shit sometime. By the way have you seen my Under Amrour vest? You know the one, it's blue with long sleeves, could be quite chilly tomorrow so I want to find it.
R: Oh, the blue one with the orange writing of 'Norfolk Academy', a slight white strip from strapping over it, it was on the third shelf of your cupboard with your new T- shirt.
B: That's the one, you got it?
R: No, I have none of your things. I have absolute respect for other people's property.
B: Right. Moving on. Raubs tell us something of your incredible tact with women these days. Apparently your pik up lines have been refined and honed into a spearwhich can penetrate any woman's heart.
R: Ah indeed bud. Well it's not really a question of tact more tactless.
B: Give us an example there brosive.
R: Well two weekends ago I told some chick that I would: "Punch her in the cunt unless he sucked my fat man cock. Last weekend I distinctly remember telling some Stellies chick that I knew she wanted me o gut her and wanted to know why she seemed offended when she had just told me that she was from Stellies. I was under the impression that all chicks in Stellies wanted to get 'gutted'.
B: Jesus.
R: Yes, some have called me by that name.
B: Ha. Predictions for tomorrow?
R: It's gonna rain Nadoes blood, and drip wet cunt
B: Hectic.
Thank you all for stopping by yet again. I must say I have this image of all the Cobras okes smsing one another to tell each other that the latest weather report is up. I see you boys huddled raound a computer laughing and shit. Maybe touching each other ever so fondly. However,I realise that this is probably not the case and that the majority of you haven't even heard about this shit. So to those of you who do read (Graeme, Dil, Warren) thank you. Youve made one very talentless blogger very happy.
Until next time,
Always take the weather with you...
We will be playing against Easterns at 17:30 on Wednesday in the Cup Quater Final of the UCT Internal League 2008. One doesn't need to explain the importance of the fixture...
