Fixtures and Groups

The groups and fixtures have been drawn for the 2010 Internal League, and this is how it looks:

Group 1: Tornadoes, Marquard, Shebeen Boys, Panthers
Group 2: Ikhaya, Clarendon, Smuts, Ubumbo,
Group 3: Cobras, College House, Spanners, Magic Lions
Group 4: Wildboys, Kopano, Turtles, Catsville CPUT

So as you can see we have been drawn with Res side College House, the EBE Spanners and the newcomers to the league the Magic Lions who are a Marquard Old Boys side, who we face first on Wednesday 21st of April at 19:30.

The fixtures are as follows:

Wednesday 21st of April
19h30 Cobras vs Magic Lions - Groote Schuur C

Wednesday 28th of April
17h30 Cobras vs Spanners - Groote Schuur B

Wednesday 5th of May
17h30 Cobras vs College House - Groote Schuur C

Wednesday 12th of May
Round 2 first games

So that's what the first half of the 2010 league fixtures look like.

SQUAD TOUCH IS COMPULSORY FROM HERE ON IN, POSSIBLE FIXTURE THIS MONDAY (PUBLIC HOLIDAY) TO BE CONFIRMED.

It looks set to be a cracking first half of the season, with pre-season warm-up game, Cobras AGM and pre-season function...

Oh so brave

The Graham Gooch Cricket Festival 2010

The Cobras are putting together their first ever Cricket side to compete in a 7-a-side cricket festival this coming Sunday which is being held at Van Der Stal in Stellenbosch (first game at 9am)

The team is perfectly balanced with some old veterans of the game, mixed with some real gutsy and ambitious individuals who will do whatever is required of them to make sure that The Cobras Cricket Team bring home the first piece of silverwear for 2010.

Although not much will be said or revealed about who is exactly in the side at this stage, one can expect a quality and well oiled unit that will be travelling out to Stellenbosch on Saturday to get used to the conditions and the heat before the cricket begins the next day.

The Cobras cricket team will be staying in Stellenbosch until Monday evening to watch UCT vs. Maties in the Varsity Cup final, hopefully resulting in two tropheys being brought back to Cape Town on Tuesday morning.

Get out to Stellenbosch on Sunday to prepare yourself for the Varisty Cup Final on Monday, come down to the cricket, there will be cheap beers etc. and a massive vibe so get down and support The Cobras. You can bring your own drinks too and the Cobras Gazebo will be up for all travelling supporters.

Sunday 26th March from 9am

Event info here:

http://www.facebook.com/?sk=events#!/event.php?eid=370791704652&ref=ts

We wish the Cobras Cricket side the best of luck as they embark on their 3 day tour to Stellenbosch.

TOUCH ON SUNDAY 5PM @ BISHOPS (please make an effort to get down and for the guys who haven't paid their 2010 Cobras registration fee please contact Craig on 0827834640 ASAP

Touch cancelled

Touch today is cancelled due to the Varsity Cup Semi Final this afternoon, 16:15 on The Green Mile.

Possible warm-up fixture this Sunday

JaaaaaaaaaaaaSus bru..

Don't think he was expecting that...

The Cobras 2010 Proposed t-shirt

This is the proposed Cobras shirt for the 2010 season, any comments or suggestions to be written on the Cobras RFC group page on Facebook.

Representing

The Cobras have a strong presence in the Varisty Cup as many a Cobra is lending their services to the Nadoes Varsity Cup side for their campaign.

Cobras players included in the Nadoes team for the Varsity Cup are Justin Bijl, Trent Jenkinson, JP Van Huffel, Ian Armstrong, Xanti Nessi, Ryann Dean and Brendan Raubenheimer.

Not to forget about the Cobras who are representing the Ikey Tigers in their Varsity Cup campaign - Pete Haw, Nicholas Fenton-Wells, Mike Ledwidge, Mike Nel, Adrian Kritzinger, Zandy MacDonald, wish them all the best of luck for the remainder of the competition.

Follow the Ikey Tigers on http://www.uctrfc.co.za
Follow the Varsity Cup on http://www.varsitycup.co.za

Oh so brave

Bit of this...

Cobras star James Bailes seen applying his trade in the USA in some serious College Rugby. Rumour has it that Bailo will be making his way back to The Cape of Good Hope in early May as he leaves his Burkley contract to re-join the Cobras for the better part of what looks set to be an awesome 2010 season.

We look forward to having our man back in the Purple and White, especially with hair like that.

Oh so brave

FIRST GAME OF THE SEASON 14TH OF APRIL 2010

TOUCH EVERY SUNDAY 5PM @ BISHOPS

Everywhere you go...

Bonjour mes amis! That's basically french for hello/goodday my friends.

How wonderful. My grasp of french clearly knows no bounds. It's been so long dear readers. Fear not, I have been keeping you in my thoughts where ever I go and in what ever I do. My account of life in france and european sexuality is long and complicated. Filled with many a climax, so to speak. No no no. Not those kinds of climax's. Silly filthy minded friends of mine. So where to begin? Where to end? Shall I start at the end and work backwards or start in the middle and branch out haphazardly? So much indecision here my brothers. Too much indecision. Incapacitated by indecision you might say. How very heavy indeed. 

So my brothers. Here I am. Sitting in my small room in france. I have recently returned from what can only be described as a completely Austrian fuck show with two fellow Cobras. None other than Diiiiiiiiiiiiiiillon MCEVOY! and 'I said Phil, Phil, Phil the Drill....' Wow wee. Fun was had I must say. After boarding six different trains and spending 24hrs traveling I arrived in St Anton am Arlberg. Google it. Google map it. So this is a very small Austrian town that is home to many Austrians and many more tourists. Mostly europeans. Swedes, Dutchies, Norway people (Yes Graeme I know it's NORWEGIANS), Germans and of course French, spanish and Slovakian. The story really gets going when I finally arrive at the train station in St Anton to be greeted by our two fellow cobras who I have already named. Straight into the jol. I pre-empted the evening by drinking a few cold Heinekens by myself on the train. Sad some might say. Foresighted I say. Dil and Phil were, of course, smashed at this stage. The surreal situation of walking through a tiny Austrian town on a friday night did not go unnoticed. Wow wee was it a pleasure to see these two gents. Of course, in true weather man style, I brought some much needed snow with me. Back we strolled to Dil's apartment. Now I have met some strange people in my life but nothing quite prepared me for the array of bizarreness that I was greeted by when I entered that small stuff flat. Hell's teeth. The first person I meet as I come walking in is Dil's boss. Basically a Nazi. Those people that tell you that anti semitism is dead in Germany/Austria are lying. There are thousands of closet Nazis. Runnin' around, kickin through the snow. But this china was bald with a big gold ring and Marlboro reds. Now my greek ancestry has given me some very handsome looks but along with that comes beautiful curly hair and a well established nose. To an Austrian you might as well be wearing a sign around your neck that says: Hey! Fuck you. So I didn't really get such a good vibe off him. But neither did Dil. Dil has been struggling for months with this psycho. Those are different stories for a different time. 

Down we descend into the windowless world of a gappies apartment. Dil, like few others, has managed to hook himself up with a great job. He's a breakfast chef at a local hotel. He works from 06:30 to 13:30 everyday. Yet still he trooped on. His apartment was free and his expenses were limited to snow boarding gear and dinners. Anyway, I digress. So down the stairs we go. Dil is giving me a good go on the house rules. Snowboard boots outside etc. Washing up. Put on clothes when strolling around the apartment etc. He's become incredibly domesticated that young man has. Very admirable. He's not living in the state of squalor I had imagined. When we get downstairs I meet Reino (Pronounced Rhino). He is a small wispy haired chap with a greying beard. he's at least fifty five but claims to be ten years younger. Not a chance bro. Everyday he strolls around in loose old man vest and denim shorts. These denim shorts come just below the knees. For shoes he dons beige socks in jesus sandals. Helluva vibe. You could imagine him being one of the ous who turned in jews in those small towns. Dil digs him though so we'll give him the benefit of the doubt. "I grew up in Austria." Cool, so did Hitler. Anyway. That's Reino, the quasi landlord of the place who lives above Dil's apartment. Sharing Dil's humble abode are three Slovakian girls and one raging homosexual called Dion from Indonesia. Along way from home he was. Let's start with the more colourful of the four roommates. Dion. Dion, Dion, Dion. What a character. Dion moved to Vienna after some serious drug problems that he had in Bali. You name it, he's done it. It got to the stage (and this is from the horse's mouth) that drug dealers refused to sell him drugs. Drug dealers with consciences, not something I'd heard of before. Ag well anyway. So Dion moved to Vienna and got married. To a man of course. He's been working and living in Austria for a good few years now. His husband actually came to visit us a day or so later. He was a middle aged Austrian man. He wore glasses and I am sure he had a tertiary education behind his name. His name was Johan. He looked like the kind of man who worked as a lecturer, not the estranged husband of a thrity one year old gay indonesian drug addict. Heavy days. Basically Dion told us that the two of them were no longer in love and they could bang anyone they wanted. Jeez. We had quite a few great chats. Later I was to learn that Dion found me quite handsome. Put on the gayest asian accent possible and repeat this sentence after me: Bug is soooo handsome. Quote unquote. said to Dillon Mcevoy two nights after my arrival. The door stayed locked for much of the rest of that trip. Just joking I banged his lights out. Just joking again. Or am I? (Cue strange look from Mugatu to Claud his assistant after giving him a dairy coffee). Weird. Ness. So now we have our final three characters. Th three slovakian girls. You'll remember that Dillon Mcevoy mentioned that he was sharing a flat with three or four Swedes, conjouring images of all night orgies, pink panties and jaw dropping scenes that made you jealous and scared at the same time. Well I can safely say that none of that is going on. It's so far from that. Too far from that from Dil's point of view. Two of the three were not so hot. The one is quite hot but I think she has her eye on Reino. Alas poor Dil. But they were very sweet girls and very accommodating. Monica was especially nice to me. She gave me baked treats and on one occasion bought me an iced tea. She also had a severe addiction to vodka which I won't get into. 

So there you have it. i've described the characters and now for the events. Oh there is one more legend to be spoken of. He's a fellow UCT graduate and goes by the name of Raj. Absolute champion. he is going to start work with old Phil in the not too distant future and popped over for a holiday before the proverbial nine to five gets going. So the four musketeers then. Most nights followed the same sort of pattern. By a cheap case of beers then go out and throw ourselves around. Pissing off landlords and boss's in the process. Each day myself and Phil would hit the slopes for some 'epic powder runs bru'. Well I tell you what. The Austrian alps are regarded as the most dangerous avalanche country in the world. Most people, by most I mean everyone else except for me and Phil, carried a little peeps around. A peeps is a device that sends off and electronic signal to alert the authorities to your whereabouts in case you get stuck in an avalanche. For four days Phil and I risked our lives by jumping into the abyss. Nerve wracking at times but awfully exciting. The most eventful excursion had to be crawling under a net (the net was in place to stop people going down a very rocky, steep death slope. We unstrapped our boards and slid down. It entails holding onto rocks and then letting go to slide a few feet and hope to god you are able to stop before you slide over the edge. If you go over the edge it's bye bye baby. Anyway. Phil drops in first and is caught by the thick snow on the edge of the precipice. I hand the snow boards down to him. Which he catches to my immense relief. Then I come down. I let go of the rock too soon making my fall that little bit longer and faster. Phil had to throw himself in front of me to stop what could have been a rather bleak highlight to my trip to Austria. Thanks Phil. Needless to say the mission was worth it and we enjoyed some very delicious untouched snow for a few hours. Everyday continued in this vain. Dil would generally join us after his stint in the kitchen for a few little bunny hops and the odd mid- slope scuffle. Joyous times. 

Come Tuesday though my luck ran out. Our final jolling night was to be spent doing some ridiculous taboganing down dimly lit roads on the mountain. AWESOME. We got really smashed before and spent the cable car trip up singing old cobras change room songs. Forty feet above the ground. Definitely the Cobra's most extreme change room session thus far. After some merry making we reached the top and proceeded to fly down hill. I wasn't going to include this but I won. There it is. I did. I pipped Dil and our Australian mate shea at the line. Sorry. It's a fact though. Coincidently the Austrian Olympain taboganist, Claus Rodler, happened to be eating dinner at the restaurant at the finish line when he saw me come flying in. The last four hundred meters or so. In short, he approached me singing my praises. He was having dinner with his agent and mentor, Ulli Stingingleider, at the time. Both said they had never seen such natural talent before. both were on their phones to dignitaries on the Austrian athletics board. They were demanding I be offered a green card asap. However I declined their offer a life time buckworst supply because I swore I would return to South Africa to become my country's first ever winter Olympian. A dream I have had since a very young age. Anyway.

So after all these shenanigans we proceeded down hill. Both literally and figuratively. on the way down we decided to play the fool in little snow field. This entailed big hits and general merry making. in the hullabaloo I lost a show. Oh where oh where has my little left shoe gone? That's a question that still hasn't been answered. We searched for many minutes. Alas she cried! It was gone. Onward I tramped all the way to the night club, barefoot and disconsolate. I was devastated. Anyway, Raj kindly offered me the services of his left Adidas slop. You know the kind with the little bumps and the velcro straps. Everyone knows someone who used to rock those with socks to get-togethers in like standard four or five. I know a few people. Pete Haw maybe? Graeme Steen? Although Graeme Steen is awfully partial top a velcro strap he wouldn't go that far. So our night went in the general direction of most nights. I awoke the next morning to a severe hangover and one less shoe. This was a serious problem as I had to return to france that night and french and swiss train stations aren't exactly conducive to wearing one shoe. Rather dirty. Anyway. So we went and had another look in the field. Still no shoe. Still no luck. To make matters worse I had nought but ten euros to my name, no airtime and no battery on my cellphone. Heavy days. I had to survive 24hrs of train tripping in said state. NOT IDEAL. Not ideal in the slightest. No ways Jose. No money for to buy me food, no money for to phone a friend to pick me up at the end of the line. No phone to receive reassuring messages from my loved ones. Just a half filled iPod and a massive book to keep me company. And keep me company they did. Those were some very long hours my friends. I am glad to say I have returned to Biarritz in one piece but I looked like a complete fool walking through major cities in europe wearing my right shoe and one very white hotel slipper. Rather comical I must say. I had a good laugh at myself. I think most of europe had a good laugh at me too. I was carrying a snowboard so I put on a little limp at times and I think I may have got away with it. Why is that guy wearing a hotel slipper? (Cue limp) Oh, must have hurt it snowboarding. He's cool. Fuck he's cool. You'll see. By tomorrow most of europe will be cruising around in one shoe and one hotel slipper. By stocks in hotel slipper manufacturers. trust me. It's about to go through the roof.

Anyway. So here I am. I've got practice tonight. I've got a smile on my face. I know, that as a Cobra you always take that special spirit with you. I also know that where ever I am in the world there will more than likely be a fellow Cobra to take you in, feed you, bed you and give you that much needed beer.

Until next time dear friends, ALWAYS TAKE THE WEATHER WITH YOU!

2010

Above is the jersey the Cobras will be wearing for their 5th assault on the UCT Internal League Competition in 2010...

TOUCH EVERY SUNDAY 5PM AT BISHOPS

Oh so brave...

What it all means

The following words come courtesy of Xhanti Nesi aka Nessi aka Cobra till I die aka Club Captain aka Mayor of P.EEEEEEEEEEE. Truly inspirational....

Cobras Till I Die........

Gentle men of the Purple Cobras, it is a pleasure to write to you. It has been awhile since I have had the opportunity to address you. I am in no position to be offering solace for the dubious happenings of the internal league, but I can say that the emotional turmoil and frustration that plagues you is a familiar feeling to me as well. It’s often said that the measure of a man is not the amount of victories he has achieved but rather how well he handles defeat. 

I have often asked myself what are the Purple Cobras. Is it merely a rugby team? Perhaps a group of friends that get together to jol some rugga or opportunity to showcase some sublime ball skills? The answer to all the above is NO. 

Purple Cobras is not just a rugby team, it is not just a group of friends and it is not merely a classy side with slick handling ability. Gentle- to me the words Purple Cobras have come to mean so much more than all the above. Purple Cobras is Brotherhood. It encamps so much more than rugby. Our starting point admittedly is rugby but this team far exceeds what goes on between the four white lines. 

When I joined the Cobras I was welcomed with a cold beer, big smiles and an amazing song. I have gone on to share some of my fondest UCT memories with you gentlemen. I know that this year I was not part of the team but that was because of Club Captain duties. Without delving into too much explanation, as Exco we wanted to retain most of the residence players that stopped playing after their U/20 season when they moved into digs. My role is to work with the Marquard boys that I lived with and start and Old Marquard Boys team to retain all these players that fall through the system. I hope you will reach your satisfaction. 

I hope that you have enjoyed this season and reached the markers that you set out for yourselves. It is an absolute pleasure to be associated with you and my chest swells with pride at the mention of Purple Cobras. I have come to accept that I will never attend another fines meeting like yours and I am glad that I am always welcome to join you. 

In closing. The next time you look at a Cobras badge. Look not at the symmetry of the lines or the colors that it comprises off. Look deeper and think of all that it means to you. The friends, the big tackles, the nights at Tiger Tiger, the line-breaking runs, the massive PE Bus Jol, the anticipation before a game, the bail-outs, the fines meeting, the guest list at bang bang and most importantly the relationships we have come to have with one another- That is the Purple Cobras.   

I’m a COBRA Till I DIE........

One last hurrah!

Tomorrow sees the Cobras men fight it out against the Wild Boys for the 3rd place spot in the 2009 UCT internal league. Many are predicting tomorrow curtain raiser to be the match of the night...

so catch the 2008 champions in their last showing of the season tomorrow at 19:30!

Wednesday 23rd
Purple Cobras vs Wild Boys
curtain raisor to the final
19:30
on Rugby A

Not to be...

The Green Mile turned from friend to foe for the Purple Cobras last night, producing the biggest upset of the season. Things on the Groote Schuur strip weren't quite right, actually they were very off-ish. There was not a breath of wind, the evening was actually rather pleasant as opposed to usual bitter bite in the air, all culminating in, well, the Cobra's first loss in 11 internal league fixtures after going to down 14-5 to Ubombo last year! The opponents this time round were Ikaya! The only other meeting between the two sides came back in 2007, which saw the Cobras taking the spoils in a comprehensive 65-0 win! This time round however the outcome was to be vastly different. Ikaya, controversially packed with a number of Villagers first and second team players(but thats a story for another day), came out with more of a purpose catching the 2008 champions a bit off guard. There was nothing much between the sides seeing the game locked scoreless for quite some time. Ikaya grabbed onto everything they got and pounced onto two ultimately fatal mistakes by the Cobras resulting in two converted tries. The Cobras simply could not shift out of first gear and as the time started to slip away the side found themselves playing scatter rugby, frantically trying to breach the Ikaya defence. In a position very unfamiliar to the Cobras men, they were playing catch up rugby and could not seem to put any phases together. The death rattle of the whistle drew the game to an end, with Ikaya edging out slender 14-8 victors.

An unfortunate at the helm for the mighty Cobras, it just proved purhaps that even the UCT Purple Cobras are human and capable of mishap?

Despite the loss, the atmosphere in the change room was more electric than ever, proving that there is more to Cobras rugby then titles and silverware!!

The season is not over however, the Cobras will be playing for the third place title next week!

Cobras rugby is still very much alive, with a record of 34 matches, 28 wins, 4 loses and 1 draw, they very possibly hold the best win record in UCT internal league history...

COBRAS TILL WE DIE!

It is our time...

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After starting touch sessions 8 months ago, we are down to the last two fixtures of the long season. Tonight The Cobras take on Ikhaya in the Internal League Cup Semi-Final, kick off 18:30. All the hours out on the touch field, all the blood and sweat on the Green Mile every Wednesday night, it all boils down to this fixture to send us through to our 3rd final in as many years, and then ultimately keeping our Cup which we won last year.
.
We have the passion, we have the pride, we have the class, we have the skill, and most importantly, we have the belief. This is our time Cobras...it's going to be one helluva great ride.
.

UCT INTERNAL LEAGUE CUP SEMI-FINAL

WEDNESDAY 16 SEPTEMBER

The Cobras vs. Ikhaya

Kick off: 18:30 UCTRFC Field-C

Meet 17:30 below Cecil

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Oh so brave

The final stretch...

The following itinery is COMPULSORY if you wish to be apart of the final two games of the season:

Touch: Friday 11 Sep 4pm
Touch: Sunday 13 Sep 4pm
Semi-Final: The Cobras vs. Ikhaya 18:30 UCT C-Field
Touch: Friday 18 Sep 4pm
Touch: Sunday 20 Sep 4pm
Final Day: Wednesday 23rd Sep

Oh so brave

Transfer news...

UCT Ikey Tigers hero and winger Justin Bijl seen above showing what he will do to play for the purple and white at last years formal He has set his eyes on playing for The Cobras in the 2010 competition. Local media reports have surfaced that Bijl will be signing with The Cobras on a 3 year contract starting in February '10 to add even more value to an already established Cobras centre pairing and loose forward combination, he was quoted as saying "I just can't resist the urge to play for such a team as The Cobras any longer, I was born for it."

If all goes to plan Bijl will be joining up with the squad in February 2010.

Oh so brave

The road taken...

The road to the semi's...

Cobras 33 - 0 Kopano
Cobras 28 - 5 Wild Boys
Cobras 24 - 0 College
Cobras 0 - 0 Barbarians (Cobras get 5 points)
Cobras 62 -0 Panthers
Cobras 31 - 13 Clarendon

Quaterfinal:
Cobras 40 - 15 Kopano

Points for: 218
Points against: 33

Played 7 Won 7 Lost 0 Draw 0

Oh so brave

And then there were 4...

The UCT Purple Cobras cantered, albeit a bit shakily, into the semi- finals of the koshuis internal league last Wednesday night. The game got off to an uncustomary start, which saw the current champions trailing at the half time break. Perhaps it was the ever present head strong wind, which haunts the green mile, the fact that half the Cobras side played earlier in the day in an old boys game, or and most likely, it was due to the fiery performance which the opponents, res side Kopano, put on display. After some swift words by captain Greame 'stumpie' Steen at the interval accompanied with the added wind advantage, the Cobras men took the game to their opponents who by this stage of the match offered very little in return.

Soon it was back to characteristic Cobras running rugby. Seeing the Cobras men run in 4 unanswered tries, taking the score from 12-15 down (the half time score) to the end result, 40-15. Aided by the Cobras elusive winger JP Van Huffel who ran in an amzing 4 out of the Cobras 6 tries! Our opponents just can't seem to keep this man at bay! Another stella performance from stand in flyhalf Richard Morris, marshalling his back line and slotting over 4 conversions from his 5 attempts, according to sources thats his first 80% effort in any sphere of life. The forwards too stood up to the challange!

A couple of new caps were earned on Wednesday night, non over then Bishops 2nd XV number 8 and brother of na na na Nico, Dino Lozides, drinking on a school night, nice!

The Cobras, as do the rest of the league, have an deserved 2 week break from Wednesday night action, before the heading into the semi's!

Final score Cobras 40- Kopano 15.

BOOM!

Another victory...

The Cobras kept their unbeaten record intact for 2009 as they brushed aside an extremely motivated Kopano side who gave it their all to knock the defending Champions out of the competition, however this wasn't the case as The Cobras scored 28 unanswered points in the second half to make the win an easy one, final score 40-15 to the Cobras.

Match report to follow.

Oh so brave

Everywhere you go...

Sawatdee Khrab!

Ya basically that's Thai for hello. No I did not type it into a free translation program found on Google. I'm a very well travelled and cultured young man if you must know. But aren't we all at the Cobras. Aren't we all just so fantastic? The answer: You bet your fucking life we are!

So it's Monday. Blue Monday. Not quite. There's that classic line from Office Space- does someone have a case on the Mondays? It really irritates the main character (Peter), I told you before I'm cultured, and it certainly irritates me. It grates me. It grates my tits. Oh, just punch me in the.... tits! Two myprodols and a couple of Heinekens are making this incredibly interesting. Back to Monday, the day before Tuesday and the day following Sunday. I'm sure you all knew that. Except for maybe Fetish. Don't think fetish knew that. So it's Monday and it's dark and wintery and windy outside my window. Very bleak. Not me, I'm happy (I told you I just popped two myprodols and some Heineken). It's just that the weather is bleak. Na mean? Alright. So Wednesday and the quarter finals are only days away (Fetish Wednesday follows Tuesday). The Cobras are reaching the business end of the season and it looks set to be a cracker jack finish. I, unfortunately, will not be present this Wednesday. Business you see. No no no, not in Joburg. In Zimbabwe believe it or not. Meeting some important clients. Taking off a few days of Varsity to wine and dine this lot. Big spenders you see. 

So here is the weather report for Wednesday. 

There's a maximum of 30 degrees.

Minimum- 13 degrees.

30% showers with strong South Westerly winds. 

I'm expecting harsh winds up on the green mile. Powerful gusts that will make the high ball an impossible task. Impossible for a human perhaps, but when you have the likes of Stefan Terblanche at number 15, there's nothing really to worry about. I mean the man's hands are as safe as houses. To think that he's not playing for the Bokke. How lucky we are at the Cobras to rub shoulders with such amazing players. Just think of the confidence he inspires. The sheer determination of the players around him just to share a brief moment at the break down. Maybe even cop a feel and pass it off as general buggerness. Got to love the buggerness. 

So here goes. This week's interview features none other than Stefan Terblanche himself, aka Dean Smorenburg, aka the Snake, aka Starvin Marvin.

Bug: Deano, what a pleasure having you with me today. (Incidentally Dean did not opt for the myprodol/heineken concoction I'm going for). How's things? How are those shin splints?

Deano: Ya Bug (incredibly deep voice, perhaps what God sounded like when he said- let there be light), I'm all good hey. I've been holding off on a couple of squash games and some trail running to give them a rest. I mean there's no point risking it when games such as Wednesday's are on the line. How's your shoulder?

B: Hey thanks Deano. It's not often the interviewees start asking about my well being. That oke Nessi was so rude you know. Always talking about himself. Always referring to himself in the third person. Bit arrogant if I may say so myself. Good riddance I say. But Deano. There's that great quote from last year, not the security quote you did for that ou who called you Deon, but rather the one when an opposition player likened you to a well bred race horse. On steroids. How do you plead?

D: Guilty.

B: I thought so. This man is on roids people!

D: No no Bug, I meant I somewhat like a race horse.

B: Ah I see. What feature of your anatomy would you say is most like that of a race horse? huh? Hey? Ya?

(Quickly, I just figured out how to add images to this thing. Two years and I work it out right now. In honour of this moment, I'd like to honour another moment.) Pause.

COME ON! We are doing that again! It is going to happen!

D: Should I leave?

B: No, sorry Dean I just got carried away there. In the moment you see. Living in the moment. What a feeling. Can you see me in there? Tongue out. Enjoying myself. Immensely. 

D: Sick vibe. 

B: Very very very very sick vibe.

D: My legs.

B: Your legs.

D: Yes, my legs.

B: Legs

D: MY LEGS!

B: Are?

D: My most similar feature to that of a race horse! Idiot. That's the question you asked me before you went mad and started ranting. 

B: I... I...

D: Save it. Leave it. Move on.

B: Ok. Sorry. Well we're done.

D: What do you mean we're DONE?! What a waste of time. 

B: Bleak. Like emotionally bleak, not in the sense that the weather is bleak.

D: Fuck off. 

B: Where to?

D: Somewhere far.

B: Like Zimbabwe?

D: Yes. 

B: Cool

So there you have it gents. Another enlightening and eventful conversation with another enlightening and eventful Cobras character. Best of luck for Wednesday my friends. May it be a boringly easy. Until next time...

Always take the weather with you!

Knock out stages...

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UCT Internal League quaterfinal:

Wednesday 2nd of September

The Cobras vs. Kopano

Kick off 20:30

Meet 19:30 below Cecil

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We have finally reached the knock out stages of the competition, we know what is required from here on in...

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Oh so brave